Sleep. Weep. Repeat.

It’s like a birth but it is in reverse never gets better, always gets worse

131,406 notes

If you repeat something over and over again it loses its meaning; You watch the sunset too often it just becomes 6 pm, you make the same mistake over and over you stop calling it a mistake. If you just wake up wake up wake up wake up wake up wake up one day you’ll forget why
Phil Kaye from Repetition (via kiddings)

(Source: myheartgoesbumbumbum, via lonelystiles)

2 notes

I’m pretty much just becoming Bender from Futerama cause all I do is drink throughout the day and gloat about how great I am despite being fucking worthless.

5 notes

Garbage:
Honesty
comes from a certain
point of exhaustion.

I’m tired
of being alone
I’m tired
of fucks
for the sake
of coming
and being felt

I’m tired
of the lonely
and the,
in need of
a charm.

We are not
things to wear
for luck.

I am
a bastard
who needs the love
that forgives
and that stays

my forehead
scarred
from the floor
my knuckles
scarred
from the wall

this house
is sick of the way
I heal.

I want to
turn this house
into a hole
in the ground

that shows
where exactly
I lost it.

Twenty-three years
of the same walls
containing

my fathers scream,
the strength of his arms
where he slammed doors shut
and broke the hinges

my mothers honesty
the words
she sang
that still
haunt this house
reminding it

it was never a home
to anyone

just a place
where people broke things
and felt broken.

Where love left.

Filed under drunk writing not where I wanted to take this jesus took the wheel that piece of shit poems poetry prose wiriting

4 notes

Want to drink more
Want to be home alone longer
Want to distract myself
Want this new job to call back so I can go break things

Want to talk to anyone about anything other than how we’re doing.
Wanna sleep.
Wanna hurt more.
Wanna heal
Wanna be able to see friends without wanting to die.

~*time isn’t on your side, honey you know it never was*~

4 notes

Anonymous asked: you okay man?

No.
I want to break every wall in my room with my fists until all that’s left of the plaster are the parts held together by nails and chicken wire. Cause that’s her absence and that’s all the little crucifications I feel every time I learn no part of me is good enough to be worth loving again.

I want to scream at the mess I made until my neighbors understand poetry and pain and just want to listen and see what it looks like to lose something important.

I want to go wild until my fists won’t want to open anymore, until my fists don’t want to touch anything that isn’t her hand and will just break and ruin anything else.

I want to lose it until every swing I take at the concrete or the plaster splatteres red cause its all fucking useless and I’d rather burn up and into nothing over this than wait out the years for time to take it all away from me.

I want to be not such a mess about it. I want it to be understood I want to be her walls to send fists into, I wanna fix her bad days, I want her old messages about being unable to stop thinking about me to be cute again and not painful. I want to support her and I wanna be worth loving and being with to her.

I wanna fall asleep next to her. With the hole in the wall as a loving reminder I kept a spot for her.

6 notes

Anonymous asked: What are you looking for in a girl?

Ain’t looking. Found her.

1 note

Anonymous asked: What's the issue between you and the gf

She doesn’t adorn my ability to break everything and she keeps saying she’s not my gf? Idk.

6 notes

Give Up You Stupid Fuck:
Mold
looks like cigarette ash
stained

inhale
exhale

everything burns down
the cigarettes
the houses you destroy
the organs you abuse.

Tilt your head back
swallow a beer
repeat until your hopes
disappear
and the day
turns to night.

Sigh
and sink
into the flood waters.

The apple of your eye
rots.
Fermentation.

All these drinks
flow to the back of your head
and you wear it on your face

you’re tired
you’ve lost too much.

Run your eyes tired against a book
abuse abuse abuse
and then sleep.

Filed under poems poetry prose writing drink all day party never sad sad sad sad sap fuck me